Friday, November 28, 2008

Giving Thanks

Today is the day after Thanksgiving, and I am home sick while my family is at Mr. Fix-it's aunt's house for a late Thanksgiving dinner. I cried a little when they left - it made me sad to not spend the day with them.

While I could have engaged in self-defeating thoughts and behavior, I chose instead to realize how thankful I am to have a family that I miss when they are away. And that I have a man in my life that doesn't even blink at taking FIVE children on an outing all by himself.

I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving and was able to recognize and celebrate all of the things there are to be thankful for.

Now, if I could just get rid of the stomach cramping... :)

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

The Cast of Players

So, I did not start off my blog with an introduction of the "players" in my life... instead, I felt the need to vent. But, hey, it's my blog, I'll do what I want.

Those of you who know me also know (or at least know of) The Players. To protect the innocent (and more often, the guilty), I have given code names to them all.

Mr. Fix-it: My fiance. I call him this because yes, he is handy around the house, but he is also in the habit of trying to fix things about life in general... he wants everyone to be happy. I love you, honey!

The Brooder: Mr. Fix-it's teenaged daughter. She enjoys making everyone's life as miserable as she thinks hers is, which I guess is what teenagers do.

The Boy: Mr. Fix-it's "tween" son. "The Boy" pretty much sums it up. Wrestling, bodily functions, shooting things with bb guns.

The Cheerleader: My "tween" daughter. We figure she will either grow up to be a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader, talk show host or mistress to an oil magnate.

Queenie: My toddler/pre-K daughter. If she doesn't like it or want to do it, it is not an option in her world (or anyone else's for that matter).

Little Man: Our infant son... the best baby in the entire world. Sweet and even-tempered... just wait until we get through with him. :)

I am sure there will be additions to the list... there are the exes, after all. ;) And while I don't like for them to take a starring role, sometimes their presence is too strong to ignore. Kind of like burnt popcorn smell (a nod to my pal Big Luke).

Monday, November 24, 2008

An Open Letter to All Exes...

As I am an ex-wife TWICE over and my fiance has an ex-wife, I have had to learn some "life lessons" surrounding these creatures and the poor children that are caught in-between their parents.

"An Open Letter to All Exes..." is my ventilation system, as well as my way of helping (or at least mildly entertaining) anyone who has an ex, is an ex, is about to be an ex, has to deal with someone else's ex or anyone who has ever watched Divorce Court. :)

Dear Ex-Wife/Husband,

This letter is to remind you that we are no longer married, as evidenced by the 40 or so page divorce decree/custody agreement of which I am certain you received a copy.

As we are no longer married, I also see it fit to remind you that (a) I don't care what you think, (b) I am not required to care what you think and (c) I don't like you all that much. Therefore, our relationship thus forward will be comprised of (1) financial transaction, (2) calendar coordination via email or text and (3) child exchange. The jist of it is this:

Ex-Wife to Ex-Husband - "Give me my child(ren), give me my money, leave me alone."
Ex-Husband to Ex-Wife - "Give me my child(ren), here is your money, leave me alone."

Please refrain from sending me countless emails under the guise of "the good of our child(ren)" - it is transparent and immature. Please see paragraph #1: The divorce decree/custody agreement has already been inked - there is nothing else to talk about. Also, please see paragraph #2: (a) I don't care what you think, (b) I am not required to care what you think and (c) I don't like you all that much.

I am not interested in your opinions, just as I am not interested in you, your thoughts, your budget, your struggles or your assertions that you are a better Christian, lover, poker player, parent, welder, etc. so on and so forth.

Essentially, please live your own life and leave me and my kids out of it.

Have a splendid day,

Your Ex-Husband/Wife